Hatred

Elizabeth Edwards, wife of Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards, says "hatred" of his rival Hillary Rodham Clinton would motivate Republicans to vote against her in the general election.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

The Clantons tend to have that effect on people.

The liberal spin

In Vietnam, as in Iraq, American presidents and military leaders went to great lengths to pretend that victory was at hand when nothing could be farther from the truth.

- NY Times (read the full editorial here)

Victory is always a possibility until liberals sabotage the chances.

Fishing

A fisherman accused of stabbing a sea lion with a steak knife after the animal stole his bait was charged Thursday with violating the federal Marine Mammal Protection Act.

- AP/ajc (read full story here)

Fighting the good fight

In the Justice Department, as with the rest of the government, an unambiguous and intellectually honest operation, constrained by the boundaries imposed from the Constitution, is not only the best way to conduct business, it is the only legal and proper way. Thus is the integrity of that document, and the nation it undergirds, upheld.

This should be the unmistakable message believed and advanced by all Republican office holders and aspiring candidates. For such people and principles, conservatives can and will fight the good fight.

- Christopher G. Adamo (read his full comments here)

I agree.

Enforcement, or lack thereof

Which is more dangerous to you: Hispanics plucking feathers out of your soon-to-be-dinner bird . . . or Islamic terrorists and money-launderers hiding out in Dearbornistan, just a few miles from Abu M's comfy office and home in a ritzy neighborhood?

- Debbie Schlussel (read her full comments here)

I would go with the Islamic terrorists as the answer.

46 years in the ground

I was digging in the garden today, trying to prepare a spot for my hardy hibiscus.

I unearthed a steel fencepost. My guess is that it was buried at the time the house was built (1961).

46 years in the ground.

It is like this every time I dig in the yard. Rusted metal, broken glass, shattered bricks, etc.

Obviously, no serious effort was made to clean up. They just spread a thin layer of topsoil over the whole mess.

Susan Estrich

The distinguished gentleman from Idaho, as members of Congress refer to each other, is a public nuisance, a blatant liar and a hopeless hypocrite. The Senate is tarnished by his presence. The people of Idaho deserve better.

- Susan Estrich, Idaho Statesman, referring to Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) (read full comments here)

It is a sad day when I agree with Susan Estrich.

Once in a lifetime event

Entomologists are debating the origin and rarity of a sprawling spider web that blankets several trees, shrubs and the ground along a 200-yard stretch of trail in a North Texas park.

Herbert A. "Joe" Pase, a Texas Forest Service entomologist, said the massive web is very unusual.

"From what I'm hearing it could be a once-in-a-lifetime event," he said.

- AP/Star Tribune (read full story here)

Linux & Liberals

Arguing, or even trying to enter into any kind of sensible discussion with a Linux fanboy is pointless. Any opinions you have will be trampled on, dismissed out of hand and their own opinion substituted in its place as fact.

- Adrian Kingsley-Hughes (read full commentary here)

I would make the same observation about Liberals.

Craig should resign

"Senator Craig pled guilty to a crime involving conduct unbecoming a senator," said Sen. Norm Coleman, R-Minn. "He should resign."

- AP/ajc (read full story here)

My good friend Norm has it correct.

Liberals violated campaign laws

An independent political group allied with Democrats has agreed to pay $775,000 in penalties to the Federal Election Commission for violating campaign laws during the 2004 presidential campaign.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

What a shocker.

Republicans

“The real question for Republicans in Washington is how low can you go, because we are approaching a level of ridiculousness. You can’t make this stuff up. And the impact this is having on the grass-roots around the country is devastating. Republicans think the governing class in Washington are a bunch of buffoons who have total disregard for the principles of the party, the law of the land and the future of the country.”

- Scott Reed, Republican strategist, quoted by the NY Times (read full story here)

Infiltrating NASA

A telephone directory is the most interesting exhibit in the ongoing federal trial against officials of a charity accused of being a HAMAS fundraising entity.

It's evidence that the Muslim Brotherhood infiltrated NASA and now has a part in Iraq's post-Saddam government.

- Debbie Schlussel (read full column here)

Pathetic.

Chokeberry

http://www.hort.net/profile/ros/arome/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chokeberry

http://www.chicagobotanic.org/plantinfo/pp/chokeberry.php

The liberal double standard

Number of U.S. attorneys fired by Ashcroft: 0

Number of U.S. attorneys fired by Gonzales: 8

Number of U.S. attorneys fired by Reno: 93

- Ann Coulter (read full commentary here)

Secular thought police

Christians have far more to fear from the secular thought police than the other way around.

- David Limbaugh (read full commentary here)

I agree 100%.

Extinct

A white dolphin native to China's Yangtze River that scientists declared extinct last year has possibly been spotted swimming in the wild, offering a small shred of hope for its revival, a researcher said Wednesday.

- AP/azcentral (read full story here)

Lends a whole new meaning to the word "extinct."

Two Losers

Former President Jimmy Carter welcomed Democratic presidential hopeful John Edwards to Georgia on Wednesday, embracing the fellow Southerner as kindred spirit on poverty and the environment.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

They deserve each other.

Edible films

(Thanks to Elizabeth for calling my attention to this one)

In a handful of food science labs around the country, people who talk about food in terms of microbes and polymers have been turning the natural pathogen fighters found in everyday food into edible films and powders.

- NY Times (read full story here)

Perennials for Wisconsin

Perennials for Minnesota and Wisconsin (2004)

by Don Engebretson and Don Williamson

Bugleweed (Ajuga)
Windflower (Anemone)
Wormwood (Artemisia)
Aster
Astilbe
Baby's Breath (Gypsophila)
Balloon Flower (Platycodon)
Bergenia
Black-Eyed Susan (Rudbeckia)
Bleeding Heart (Dicentra)
Boltonia
Siberian Bugloss (Brunnera)
Black Cohosh (Cimicifuga)
Butterfly Weed (Asclepias)
Bellflower (Campanula)
Candytuft (Iberis)
Cardinal Flower (Lobelia)
Catmint (Nepeta)
Chrysanthemum (Dendranthema)
Clematis
Columbine (Aquilegia)
Purple Coneflower (Echinacea)
Coreopsis
Mountain Bluet (Centaurea)
Daylily (Hemerocallis)
Delphinium
Euphorbia
Feverfew (Tanacetum)
Flax (Linum)
Foamflower (Tiarella)
Foxglove (Digitalis)
Gaillardia
Gas Plant (Dictamnus)
Globe Flower (Trollius)
Globe Thistle (Echinops)
Goat's Beard (Aruncus)
Goldenrod (Solidago)
Goutweed (Aegopodium)
Cranesbill (Geranium)
Hen and Chicks (Sempervivum)
Coral Bells (Heuchera)
Hollyhock (Alcea)
Hosta
Iris
Jacob's Ladder (Polemonium)
Joe Pye Weed (Eupatorium)
Jupiter's Beard (Centranthus)
Lady's Mantle (Alchemilla)
Lamb's Ears (Stachys)
Dead Nettle (Lamium)
Liatris
Ligularia
Loosestrife (Lysimachia)
Lungwort (Pulmonaria)
Lupine (Lupinus)
Maltese Cross (Lychnis)
Mallow (Malva)
Marguerite (Anthemis)
Meadow Rue (Thalictrum)
Meadowsweet (Filipendula)
Bee Balm (Monarda)
Monkshood (Aconitum)
Obedient Plant (Physostegia)
Oriental Poppy (Papaver)
Ox-Eye (Heliopsis)
Pachysandra
Pasqueflower (Pulsatilla)
Penstemon
Peony (Paeonia)
Salvia
Phlox
Pincushion Flower (Scabiosa)
Pinks (Dianthus)
Hibiscus
Russian Sage (Perovskia)
Sea Holly (Eryngium)
Stonecrop (Sedum)
Shasta Daisy (Leucanthemum)
Solomon's Seal (Polygonatum)
Speedwell (Veronica)
Spiderwort (Tradescantia)
Thyme (Thymus)
Turtlehead (Chelone)
Vinca
Wild Ginger (Asarum)
Yarrow (Achillea)

Another Republican scandal in the making

"He's disappointed the American people. Yeah, I think it reminds us of Mark Foley and Bill Clinton."

- Mitt Romney, quoted by AP/Star Tribune, referring to Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) (read full story here)

Guitar Hero III

In 2007, Metal Injection revealed that Slash will be a playable character in the highly anticipated Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock. Slash did motion capture with RedOctane to record his movements for the game, and by beating him in a one-on-one competition (playing an original composition he recorded solely for the game), he will be unlocked as a playable character. Beating him in this challenge will result in the gamer and Slash playing the master track of "Welcome to the Jungle" as an encore song.

- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slash_(musician)

Frankenfood

Though poorly known, radiation breeding has produced thousands of useful mutants and a sizable fraction of the world’s crops, Dr. Lagoda said, including varieties of rice, wheat, barley, pears, peas, cotton, peppermint, sunflowers, peanuts, grapefruit, sesame, bananas, cassava and sorghum. The mutant wheat is used for bread and pasta and the mutant barley for beer and fine whiskey.

- NY Times (read full story here)

Invading Weeds

Invading Weeds: A Growing Threat to Wisconsin's Biological Diversity (1999)

by Elizabeth J. Czarapata

The author has assembled a villains list of the very worst weeds.

Common Buckthorn (Rhamnus cathartica)
Glossy Buckthorn (Rhamnus frangula)
Siberian Elm (Ulmus pumila)
Tartarian Honeysuckle (Lonicera tatarica)
Morrow's Honeysuckle (Lonicera morrowii)
Bella Honeysuckle (Lonicera x bella)
Japanese Barberry (Berberis thunbergii)
Multiflora Rose (Rosa multiflora)
Dame's Rocket (Hesperis matronalis
Garlic Mustard (Alliaria petiolata)
Purple Loosestrife (Lythrum salicaria)
Reed Canary Grass (Phalaris arundinacea)
Kentucky Bluegrass (Poa pratensis)
Canada Bluegrass (Poa compressa)
Wild Parsnip (Pastinaca sativa)
Spotted Knapweed (Centaurea maculosa)
Canada Thistle (Cirsium arvense)
Musk or Nodding Thistle (Carduus nutans)
Plumeless or Bristly Thistle (Carduus acanthoides)
Bull Thistle (Cirsium vulgare)
Yellow Sweet Clover (Melilotus officinalis)
White Sweet Clover (Melilotus alba)
Common Teasel (Dipsacus sylvestris)
Cut-leaved Teasel (Dipsacus laciniatus)
Crown Vetch (Coronilla varia)
Leafy Spurge (Euphorbia esula)
Eurasia Water Milfoil (Myriophyllum spicatum)
Black Locust (Robinia pseudoacacia)

The author considers one native plant as bad as the above listed crowd.

Poison Ivy (Toxicodendron radicans)

Fatheads

I bought a "dozen" fathead minnows (Pimephales promelas) and dumped them into the backyard garden pool as an experiment.

http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us/huntwild/wild/species/carpmin/

http://www.fishbase.org/Summary/SpeciesSummary.php?id=4785

http://elib.cs.berkeley.edu/kopec/tr9/html/sp-fathead-minnow.html

http://www.aquarticles.com/articles/ponds/Speirs_Fathead_Minnows.html

Was Liddy involved?

Police have issued a description of the suspect in a weekend burglary at Democratic presidential candidate Christopher Dodd's Senate office in Hartford.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Was G. Gordon Liddy involved?

Weeds

Weeds (1987) by Alexander C. Martin

Profusely illustrated handbook of weeds with distribution maps.

We have a great many of the listed weeds in our yard, in spite of our best efforts to eradicate them:

Curled Dock (Rumex crispus)
Smartweed (Polygonum spp.)
Carpetweed (Mollugo verticillata)
Wood Sorrel (Oxalis corniculata)
Plantain (Plantago rugelii)
Horseweed (Erigeron canadensis)
Ragweed (Ambrosia artemisifolia)
Burdock (Arctium minus)
Canada Thistle (Cirsium arvense)
Dandelion (Taraxacum officinale)

Some occur naturally, and continue with our permission:

Cinquefoil (Potentilla canadensis)
Queen Anne's Lace (Daucus carota)
Bittersweet (Solanum dulcamara)
Goldenrod Solidago canadensis)

In addition, some of the species that do not occur naturally, and that we have planted, are listed as weeds:

Horehound (Marrubium vulgare)
Moonflower (Datura innoxia)
Joe Pye Weed (Eupatorium purpureum)
Black Eyed Susan (Rudbeckia seratina)
Yarrow (Achillea millefolium)

Reagan

"You can't put a price tag on the American Dream. That dream is the heart and soul of America; it's the promise that keeps our nation forever good and generous, a model and hope to the world."

President Ronald Reagan
October 22, 1986

Martians

A new interpretation of data from NASA's Viking landers indicates that 0.1% of the Martian soil tested could have a biological origin.

- Science Daily (read full story here)

That seems like a low percentage, "comparable to what is found in some permafrost in Antarctica."

Cosmic basalt

The presence of basalt means that the asteroid must have melted partially at some time in the past, which implies that it was once part of a larger body which had internal heating processes. However, there do not appear to be other basaltic fragments in the region and, from spectral analysis, it is not clear whether the two are fragments of the same parent body or not.

- Science Daily (read full story here)

This galaxy is a strange place.

Marburg virus

A collaborative team of scientists reported findings today demonstrating the presence of Marburg virus RNA genome and antibodies in a common species of African fruit bat (Rousettus aegyptiacus).

- Science Daily (read full story here)

Very bad stuff, related to Ebola.

Salvia divinorum

These groups, among others, are cautiously tracking moves to ban Salvia divinorum, an herb-based hallucinogen used spiritually by Mazatec Indians from the Oaxaca area, and increasingly popular among teens and college-age students, according to the National Institute on Drug Abuse.

- Houston Chronicle (read full story here)

The Clantons

Democratic rivals criticized Hillary Rodham Clinton on Friday for her comment that a terror attack between now and the election would help the Republicans.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

The Clantons have always been all about political calculations.

Macyn Taylor

We saw Macyn Taylor at the New Berlin Farmers Market on Saturday.

Only heard a few songs, but she has an interesting voice and some good guitar to go with it.

Getting along

In case you had any doubt that Western Civilization is mired in a crisis of suicidal self-loathing and pre-emptive surrender, a Catholic Bishop in the Netherlands has publicly commented that Christians should begin to refer to God as “Allah” so as to make Muslims like us better -- or at least bomb us less.

- Mac Johnson (read the full column here)

Pathetic.

Defeatism

The Democrats' latest ploy of shifting the goal posts to dampen Gen. Petraeus's anticipated report of military successes in Iraq by emphasizing the slow progress on the political side makes it increasingly hard to deny they are working for defeat at all costs.

- David Limbaugh (read his column here)

Of course.

How the Democrats lost Vietnam

The strategy chosen to extract the US with the minimum of risk to its ally South Vietnam and the region was “Vietnamisation”. The US would withdraw its military, train up the Vietnamese and back Saigon with guaranteed and continuing military and economic support.

Those guarantees were written in to the 1973 Paris Peace Accords negotiated by Henry Kissinger under which North Vietnam pledged to withdraw from Laos and Cambodia and not to overthrow the Saigon Government. But Hanoi knew it could violate the accord with impunity, confident that the large postWatergate Democrat majority in Congress would never authorise renewed airstrikes. Not only that; the Democrats refused to authorise the promised US military aid, leaving the South Vietnamese all but defenceless against North Vietnam’s rapid Soviet-assisted military build-up, and its full-scale tank-led invasion in 1975.

- Rosemary Righter, Times of London (read her full column here)

Iraq

Our diplomatic and military leaders in Iraq, their current strategy, and most importantly, our troops and the Iraqi people themselves, deserve our continued support and more time to succeed.

Progress is being made and there is real reason for hope. It would be a tragic waste and lasting strategic blunder to let the hard-fought and important gains slip away, leaving chaos behind to haunt us and our allies for many years to come.

- Rep. Brian Baird (D-Wash.) in The Seattle Times (read full editorial here)

I am amazed bordering on stupification that I agree with a Democrat.

Many of his fellow Democrats have already declared failure.

Wii Sports Baseball

http://www.gamewinners.com/wii/WiiSports.htm

http://www.mycheats.com/view/faq/6403/29056/wii_sports/wii

http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/wii/file/933010/46954

http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/wii/file/933010/46054

http://www.cheatingdome.com/wii/15409.htm

It was hotter back then

Once upon a time, Ice Age creatures like the mammoth had a hard time finding water in the area now known as the Everglades.

But that was more 100 centuries ago, shortly after the last Ice Age -- a mostly dry and very hot period, said archaeologist Willard Steele, who heads the Tribal Historic Preservation Office at the Ah-Tah-Thi-Ki Museum in the Seminole Tribe's Big Cypress Reservation south of Clewiston.

Richard C. Hulbert, vertebrate paleontologist at the Florida Museum of Natural History in Gainesville, said fossil discoveries help piece together the puzzle of how Ice Age mammals lived and became extinct in South Florida.

''The area was hotter than it is today, with periods of drought,'' said Hulbert, who elaborated on the theory that Florida's then dry, hot weather, along with aggressive hunting by humans, critically upset the food chain.

- Miami Herald (read full story here)

What caused that warming? Ask the Goracle. He would know.

Games for Linux

http://www.icculus.org/lgfaq/gamelist.php

A list of 371 games available for Linux.

The banana fix

(link here)

Describes how to use a banana to fix a scratched CD.

No, this is not a joke.

Romney

Social and fiscal conservatives such as those Romney is courting generally favor fiscal discipline, loathe government bureaucracy and oppose federal mandates.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

I favor fiscal discipline, loathe government bureaucracy, and oppose federal mandates.

Chirality

But chirality, or handedness, is an essential characteristic of the molecules of life. Most naturally occurring organic molecules are chiral, meaning that they are distinct from their mirror images in the same way that our right and left hands differ.

In the lab, chemical reactions that synthesize amino acids and sugars create the right- and left-handed versions of the molecules in equal amounts. Life on Earth, however, uses one version almost exclusively, preferring what are conventionally called right-handed sugars and left-handed amino acids.

- Science News (read full article here)

Dirt road washboards

Now, a team of physicists has explained why a washboard forms, and their research has a dispiriting message for road crews: Scrape often, or give up. Washboard is inevitable.

- Science News (read full article here)

The fall of big government

One has to admire the liberal capacity to whistle past the graveyard. Rather than face the fact government is out of funds to pay for new programs, progressives are now forced to deny there even is any such problem as big government.

- Donald Devine (read his full comments here)

The Clantons

Hillary Rodham Clinton promised Thursday that as president she would improve health care quality by raising standards for providers, educating patients and requiring insurers to reward innovation.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Translation = The Clantons want to inflict Soviet-style health care on America.

States rights

GOP presidential hopeful Mitt Romney took a strong states' rights stance Wednesday on Western issues of water, mining and public lands, saying he's against "heavy-handed" intrusion by the federal government.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

I am in favor of states rights.

Easily deceived

In particular, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have in recent days displayed an alarming lack of comprehension as to what the nation needs. In its place they offer the sort of platitudes which attest to their belief that the American people are easily deceived by smooth but empty rhetoric.

- Christopher G. Adamo (read his full commentary here)

Liberals have always been easily deceived by the smooth but empty rhetoric of fellow liberals.

Small thinking

"Small thinking and outdated answers aren't the only problems with a vision for the future that is rooted in nostalgia. The trouble with nostalgia is that you tend to remember what you liked and forget what you didn't. It's not just that the answers of the past aren't up to the job today, it's that the system that produced them was corrupt - and still is."

- John Edwards, quoted by AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Ironic.

Small thinking and outdated answers have always been features of liberalism.

Lawn fascists

The mayor and City Council [Orem, Utah] have apologized to a 70-year-old woman arrested after a dispute with a police officer over her brown lawn - but she has still been charged in the case.

- AP/azcentral (read full story here)

Failure

Above all, Americans should accept that the entire nation has, to one degree or another, failed in Iraq.

- James Dobbins (read his full commentary here)

Interesting that failure has been declared before it has actually occurred.

Raise the mound

The Texas Rangers rounded the bases at a dizzying pace and became the first team in 110 years to score 30 runs in a game, setting an American League record Wednesday in a 30-3 rout of the Baltimore Orioles.

- AP/Washington Post (read full story here)

Maybe baseball should raise the pitcher's mound so we can go back to those thrilling 1-0 games of yesteryear.

Agenda before facts

An earlier version of this editorial incorrectly cited the changing of the name of the C.I.A. headquarters building as a sign of shifting priorities by its former director, George Tenet, after President Bush assumed office in 2001. The building was renamed in honor of George H.W. Bush, the current president’s father, in 1999.

- NY Times (read full editorial here)

Typical of the NY Times to not let the facts get in the way of their ultra-left political agenda.

Defeatism

Americans still don’t have the full story of how Mr. Bush hustled them into a war in which United States soldiers are trapped without hope of victory.

- NY Times (read full editorial here)

Translation = Liberals do not want U.S. troops to have any hope of victory.

Pigeons threaten bridges

Pounded and strained by heavy traffic and weakened by missing bolts and cracking steel, the failed interstate bridge over the Mississippi River also faced a less obvious enemy: pigeons.

- AP/ajc (read full story here)

The Demographic War

Liberals know they're losing the demographic war. Christians have lots of children and adopt lots of children; liberals abort children and encourage the gay lifestyle in anyone with a flair for color.

- Ann Coulter (read her full comments here)

Jim Petro

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Petro

Guns and Hunting

http://www.gunsandhunting.com/index.html

An online community devoted to guns and hunting.

Support the war effort

Former White House aides are joining Republican fundraisers in bankrolling a $15 million, five-week advertising campaign putting pressure on lawmakers whose backing of President Bush's Iraq war strategy may be wavering.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

The Breck Girl

Voters shouldn't pick a presidential candidate on the basis of either "change rhetoric" or a yearning for the past, John Edwards says, seeking to draw clearer lines between himself and rivals Barack Obama and Hillary Rodham Clinton.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Voters should not support any liberal, but some of them will.

September Dawn

Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney says he won't be attending "September Dawn," a movie about the killing of 120 unarmed Arkansas pioneers by Mormon settlers in Utah in 1857.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Obama

Presidential hopeful Barack Obama said Wednesday his wife was not taking a swipe at Hillary Rodham Clinton when she said, "If you can't run your own house, you can't run the White House."

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Heh.

Bloomberg

Mayor Michael Bloomberg said - again_ that he's not running for president, adding in a television interview that he wouldn't win anyway.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

No, but depending on how he played his cards, he might help the Clantons win a three-way race.

God & Lawns

http://www.richsoil.com/lawn/god.html

Imagine the conversation The Creator might have had with St. Francis on the subject of lawns:

God: Hey St. Francis, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there in the Midwest? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect "no maintenance" garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.

St. Francis: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers "weeds" and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.

God: Grass? But it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?

St. Francis: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. The begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.

God: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.

St. Francis: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it... sometimes twice a week.

God: They cut it? Do they then bail it like hay?

St. Francis: Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.

God: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?

St. Francis: No Sir. Just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.

God: Now let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?

St. Francis: Yes, Sir.

God: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.

St. Francis: You are not going to believe this Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.

God: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil. It's a natural circle of life.

St. Francis: You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.

God: No. What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?

St. Francis: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. The haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.

God: And where do they get this mulch?

St. Francis: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.

God: Enough. I don't want to think about this anymore. Sister Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?

Sister Catherine: "Dumb and Dumber", Lord. It's a real stupid movie about.....

God: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.

Belgian pale ales

Few things beat a crisp, bracing pilsner in the sun. American pale ales, the more subdued sibling of the I.P.A.’s, are a good bet, as are traditionally made porters and stouts, as surprising as that may sound. They are not high in alcohol, and their brisk dryness is refreshing. But what I’ve been most excited about this summer are Belgian pale ales.

- NY Times (read full story here)

In spite of the gushy story, I will stick with the handcrafted American microbrews.

On the dangers of text messaging

Officials think that Zachariah Smith was so engrossed in sending a text message Monday that he didn't notice a train - until it hit him as he crossed tracks in Elmwood Place.

- Cincinnati Enquirer/Coshocton Tribune (read full story here)

Revolver timing, part 2

Shouldn't the cylinder be aligned with the bore?

Musicovery

http://musicovery.com/

Internet radio.

Different than Pandora.

Musicovery has classical music, for one thing.

Home invaders

Two pit bull terriers broke into a house through a pet door Tuesday and attacked a woman in her bed, mauling her badly, a Pierce County sheriff's spokesman said.

- AP/ajc (read full story here)

Military solution, or lack thereof

Democrat Barack Obama said Tuesday the recent increase in American troops in Iraq may well have helped tamp down violence, but he insisted there is no military solution to the country's problems and U.S. forces should be redeployed soon.

- AP/Forbes (read full story here)

Liberals have worked long and hard to prevent a military solution.

Pacu in Colorado

(Thanks to Dad for this one)

When Ky Peterson and his friends went fishing this past Saturday at Chatfield Reservoir, they were hoping to reel in a few nice catfish, instead they ended up with something that looked more like a piranha.

The fish his friend caught was a Pacu. It's native to South America and has teeth similar to a piranha.

- 9News, KUSATV(link here)

Revolver timing

Never work on a loaded gun.

Put a light drag on the cylinder's rotation by laying your finger on
its periphery. Cock the revolver slowly. Does the bolt/cylinder stop
drop into the notches in the cylinder before the trigger drops into
the sear notch? If it does you're OK so far. Now do the same thing
but this time cock the gun with the trigger. Does the hammer fall
after the cylinder stop has dropped into the cylinder notch? Good
again. If in either of these tests events happen in reverse sequence,
your timing is off. Either your hand (pawl) is too short or it's too
far away from the axis of the cylinder, generally.

Never work on a loaded gun.

The next thing to do is to check the alignment of the cylinder's chambers
with the bore. Cock the gun and look down the bore at the junction of
cylinder and barrel. You should not see any of the face of the cylinder;
chamber and bore should be concentric. It helps to have a stong light
behind the gun so that light comes through the firing pin (hammer nose)
hole. While looking down the bore, gently attempt to rotate the cylinder.
You should again not see any of the face of the cylinder.

Never work on a loaded gun.

- John Bercovitz (link here)

Arm wrestling

Lose a game of chess to a computer, and you could bruise your ego. Lose an arm-wrestling match to a Japanese arcade machine, and you could break your arm.

- AP/azcentral (read full story here)

Broken arms have always been a feature of arm wrestling.

History lesson

(Thanks to Aunt Ruth for this one)

Your lesson in history for today!

Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals
2. Conservatives

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservation movement.

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as girlie-men.

Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.

Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, athletes, Marines, sailors, airmen, soldiers, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today's lesson in world history.

Rye whiskey

Turns out, George Washington also was first in the ranks of American whiskeymakers. Here at the Potomac River estate where Washington ran a sprawling enterprise that included farming, fishing and a gristmill, historians are shedding light on a little-known aspect of a much-studied life.

- AP/azcentral (read full story here)

Internet Web Protection Services

Internet Web Protection Services

Thanks to PC Mech for calling my attention to this site.

Verizon

Fed up with dropped calls and a string of defective cellphones, Corey Taylor said he became irate when he learned he'd have to pay $175 to get out of his long-term contract with Verizon Wireless. So he resorted to a rather extreme measure. He faked his own death.

- Washington Post (read full story here)

I just upgraded to a better phone and it solved the problems.

I never thought of faking my own death.

Presidential executive order

“On behalf of NRA members, gun owners and hunters, I’d like to thank President Bush for his steadfast support of national hunter heritage protection policies,” said Chris W. Cox, National Rifle Association’s (NRA) chief lobbyist. “As a life-long hunter, the President appreciates the essential life lessons learned in the field and countless benefits realized by America’s hunting families. In addition, President Bush understands that hunters are the nation’s true conservationists.”

This groundbreaking executive order compliments NRA’s long-standing efforts to protect and enhance hunting opportunities. These efforts include state laws eliminating barriers to youth participation, no-net-loss of public hunting lands initiatives, voluntary programs encouraging landowners to provide public hunting access to their lands and robust federal funding of critical wildlife habitat conservation programs.

The executive order details a number of specific strategic policies. Some provisions include:

· Evaluate trends in hunting participation and where appropriate address declining trends and implement actions that expand and enhance hunting opportunities for the public;

· Consider economic and recreational values of hunting in agency action;

· Manage wildlife and wildlife habitats, including wildlife management planning, to expand and enhance hunting opportunities.

This order will also encourage collaboration between Federal agencies and State governments to establish short and long term planning and managing goals for conserving public lands and game species and promote expanded hunting opportunities.

“Anti-hunting groups have long fought to dismantle public hunting land in an effort to eradicate America’s sporting heritage," added Cox. "This order guarantees that the hunters of tomorrow will enjoy the traditions and learn the skills their parents and grandparents mastered in the woods.

“America provides hunters with the richest opportunities anywhere in the world and is home to vast wildlife habitats coast-to-coast,” concluded Cox. “The President’s order will safeguard our treasured hunting heritage for generations to come and promote programs to protect diverse lands critical for wildlife species.”

- NRA (link here)

The Other Red Meat

Today buffalo meat, shunned no longer, has achieved an enviable position: simultaneous praise from chefs, nutritionists and environmentalists. At last, steak without guilt.

- NY Times (read full story here)

Reality, or lack thereof

“My gut feeling, and it’s nothing more than that is that there’s a 20 percent chance we’re living in a computer simulation.”

- Dr. Nick Bostrom, philospher at Oxford, quoted by the NY Times (read full story here)

Amtrak

Amtrak is trying to gin up new business by offering $100 in free alcohol to customers on some overnight trains.

- AP/azcentral (read full story here)

Gene Hickerson

And finally, years, if not decades after he probably should have been inducted, the 72-year-old Hickerson will be enshrined in Canton, Ohio, an overdue tribute to the Browns' pulling right guard who blocked for three Hall of Fame backs.

- AP/Miami Herald (read full story here)

A tribute long overdue.